A:

You are trying to get an idea of yourself by comparing yourself to others. This is the core of your current delusion. But comparison never yields truth or lasting clarity. 

When you compare yourself to others, you objectify both yourself and those to whom you are compared. This in effect kills any sort of life in you or them. Then you only see people in terms of these qualities. 

You learn to be okay in your own skin by being and abiding within yourself. This skin is not yours anyway. Did you ask for a body, intentionally grow your cells, or create your circumstances? Surrender this notion of having had any say in your current existence. 

You are here; and that is enough. One of the highest truths of the spiritual path is the fact that you are truly not this body nor mind. They are akin to a kind of hallucination. One may enjoy the hallucination or hate it, but the question remains: who is the one witnessing this temporary experience?

In asking yourself this question, you immediately withdraw identification from any sort of quality you can attempt to give yourself or others. Then real happiness is possible. 

“The only happiness worth the name is the happiness of conscious being.” ~ Nisargadatta Maharaj

Your current unhappiness presupposes that you can find happiness by asserting that you have superior characteristics than the people around you. But that is not any sort of real happiness either, in fact it is another form of suffering. 

Turn away from this game of comparison. Cease to seek a feeling of beauty and your feeling of ugliness will fall away. Instead, find peace in discovering yourself as the space in which the entire universe appears, plays, and disappears. Then you will know real joy and beauty. 

Meditation is a way to begin that. 

Namaste, much love :)

1 year ago
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    This so resonates with me..
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    Hi how do I learn to be ok in my own skin? I always feel ugly compared to others. It only gets worse because I...
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